Ep. 14: Welcome to the Desert (Sexless Marriage)

A conversation that Cole often has with the men he coaches is about their relationships with their wives. He gets asked about how his own wife, Ashley, bought into the new version of himself. That’s what we’re getting into today, focusing heavily on the sexlessness that existed in Cole’s marriage for years.

Cole takes us through exactly how his marriage ended up sexless, being sure to own up to the mistakes he made. We’ll also get some insight on how to avoid making your marriage sexless and why you need to stop comparing yourself to others.

On this episode of School of Man:

  • The “Amazon Prime” mindset that makes people focus on short-term rewards.
  • How Cole met Ashley after getting tired of his womanizing life.
  • Cole’s decision to move back home to Little Rock from Raleigh, shifting into a long-distance relationship.
  • Getting married and what Cole forgot to work on beforehand.
  • The first microfracture that happened on their honeymoon.
  • Remembering a warning that Cole received at his wedding.
  • Hopes that Cole had to reignite his marriage after it became sexless.
  • Why a lot of guys attach an emotion to an expectation, only to be disappointed.
  • Excuses for why a normal marriage turns into a sexless one.
  • Why it’s okay to question your love in the relationship.
  • Figuring out non-sexual things that bring excitement to both of you.
  • Why it’s not your place to figure out your wife’s stuff for her.
  • Tunnel vision and why it leads to hurting our loved ones.
  • Unhealthy alpha benchmarks.
  • Steps you can take to improve a sexless marriage.
  • Making sure you’re not doing everything for the wrong reasons.
  • A challenge from Cole to end the episode.
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